Signs of our time

Summer camp

2011-12-22T14:41:00.001-08:00

After being picked up in a limo by two very kind gentle persons, I boarded a plane that reminded me to lose weight and eat less, and, after a few thrilling hours, I've landed in a place that will be my home for the foreseeable future. I am, apparently one of the first lucky beneficiaries of a new government program aimed at addressing the acute skills shortages in a number of sectors of the economy.

The camp is one of the best organised ventures I've seen in a long time. Picture Christmas Island, but without the ocean. I believe it is in Australia, judging by the number of flies.

It is hot, mostly during the day, and usually very cold at night, thanks, sadly, to the government being forced to stop the insulation scheme because of a few shonky operators. Luckily though, the offices were insulated just in time, so that our associate instructors don't have to suffer.

The first thing we've learned when we landed was to get rid of our negativity. Negativity, especially from the Opposition, is what drives this country into the ground.

Recycling is big business in this place, so there are Say Yes signs everywhere.

The quarters we live in are called "Boganville", apparently after a bougainvillea bush that used to thrive here, before the drought and the Murray Darling basin problems that the government are tackling now head on.

The water here is 100% recycled, and everybody feels like being cosmonauts.

I've made friends immediately. So cuddly!

I've been so lucky that the free medical inspection (part of the re-skilling loan) has revealed a high risk of heart failure, because of my weight and unhealthy lifestyle. Therefore, I've been assigned to the new Green Energy program, funded by the newly established Green Energy fund.

The program is strongly focussed on developing new technologies, and I am so proud to be so lucky to be part of it, while improving my health.

During the day solar panels power the whole complex and 25% of the country. At night, teams of Green Energy Volunteers, like myself, are pedalling to generate the electricity required by the Nation.

The diet here is the government approved CSIRO diet. We eat five vegetables a day and closely watch our portions sizes.

We eat no meat because it used to come from countries that don't employ the Australian Standards in regards to slaughtering.

We have free access to the NBN (as part of our re-skilling loan), and boy, it is fast!

Even with the filter that protects us from pedophiles and other negative influences, it is so fast that it publishes what I write 2 milliseconds before I type.

We are getting a daily ration of plain packaging cigarettes that I am using to get access to the free laptops (part of the re-skilling loan) that every single one of us has received. Everybody agrees that these cigarettes are much more healthy than the branded ones. Some argue that the worst ones were those with the gangrene photo on them. The ones with the eye pictured were so, so.

Anyhow, gotta fly.

Cheerio!

Recession

2011-12-14T19:57:00.000-08:00

Romanian signs in Holland

2010-06-29T21:25:00.000-07:00

One would have thought that the Dutch would have employed a Romania speaker to review these signs.

Perhaps they have.

Australia gets its first Lady in history

2010-06-23T22:14:00.000-07:00

Breakfast

A h(i)yst(o)erical day in the Australian Politics.

The first female Prime Minister has been sworn in, after the incumbent has been left to cry in a corner.

An immense feeling of victory for feminists and a strong sense of betrayal from people that have voted Kevin Rudd in the office not so long ago.

The sobbing we had to have.

Talking to machines

2010-03-23T18:07:00.000-07:00

Today I was called on the phone by a robot from Telstra wanting to know about my experience two days ago when I could not get through to speak to a human.

It is fascinating. You must try it.

Life is uncertain

2010-02-20T22:09:00.000-08:00

Some French wisdom in Noosa.

Don't ignore your health

2010-02-20T21:48:00.001-08:00

Good old advice

2010-02-20T21:00:00.000-08:00

Police beat

2010-02-20T20:57:00.001-08:00

Breaking the glass ceiling

2010-02-19T13:27:00.000-08:00

Bossicus - Mark Roberts

Men are in the majority among managers, top executives, and higher levels of professional workers whilst women are still concentrated in the lower categories of managerial positions. Both visible and invisible rules have been constructed around the “male” norm, which women sometimes find difficult to accommo- date: male and female colleagues and customers do not automatically see women as equal with men, women tend to have to work much harder than men to prove themselves, and sometimes they have to adapt to “male” working styles and attitudes more than necessary. Furthermore, women tend to be excluded from the informal networks dominated by men at the workplace, which are vital for career development. The problem is compounded by employers’ assumption that women, unlike men, are not able to devote their full time and energy to paid work because of their family responsibilities. Consequently, women are not given as many opportunities as men to do the more demanding responsible jobs, which would advance their careers. However, there is evidence to show that once women attain the upper levels of management, attitudes towards them are not much different to those towards men.

http://www.ilo.org/dyn/gender/docs/RES/292/f267981337

Honey, did you change the Picasso in the iArt frame in the lounge?

2010-01-28T22:07:00.000-08:00

The launch of the iPad raises a legitimate question.

How long before paintings on the wall will be replaced by iFrames that download any paintings stored in the iArtstore for a meagre $0.99 a piece, on a 24 month plan with your preferred Telco.

Humour in Adelaide

2010-01-16T19:53:00.000-08:00

Incidentally, there are no powerlines for miles around this sign.

The Affordable Art Fair

2009-12-18T13:38:00.000-08:00

Art Sydney in 2010 is being re-branded to The Affordable Art Fair. It was after much consideration we decided to make this change, as the change from this model was made as the word “affordable” seemed to mean “daggy”. Since the GFC has hit, perceptions of the word seem to have shifted, and we felt it is time for a re-brand for the event which more closely reflects our aims and ideals, which is to provide the general public with quality art at an affordable price as well as an educational role. Art Sydney will be held in November in 2010 to avoid the glut of other arty events in October such as Sculpture by The Sea and Art and About.

This doesn’t mean we are dropping features or downgrading the events in any way.

We welcome suggestions on how to improve our events and I would like to encourage you to email me here with your ideas and feedback.

It is with great sadness that I tell you of the passing of the very wonderful Janice McCulloch. Janice was the Editor and owner of Art Almanac, who have supported Off The Wall tirelessly since 2006. Janice and her wonderful family are great supporters of emerging artists and indeed Janice was a great collector.

For those of us that knew Janice, it has been a very sad time as she was a real part of the art family and is very sadly missed.

The horrific death of Nick Waterlow and his daughter Chloe also rocked the art world in the same week, and our deepest sympathies go out to both families and friends.

ETHICAL CHRISTMAS PRESENTS:

In an effort to shamelessly promote our sponsor, I urge you to treat yourself or your art loving family and friends to an annual Art Almanac subscription. This is the most useful magazine on the market and keeps you up to date with who is showing what, where and when. I find the maps very handy when traveling interstate to go gallery hopping, and would be really lost without it!!

http://www.art-almanac.com.au/index.php?c=subscribe

Cash Brown - used with permission

Free back scratching (or why free hugs is a con)

2009-12-09T15:20:00.000-08:00

It's nice when people realise the benefits of reciprocal back scratching as opposed to backstabbing.

You see, unlike free hugs, where the person offering the so called "free" hugs gets an instant reward by being hugged for free, the free back scratching does not guarantee anything in return.

Most people will be happy to get a free back scratch and move on.

Some may return the favour, but most will not.

Some may even attempt the most inefficient method of dealing with the issue, using backstabbing as payback. Inefficient, because if done properly, and most people have mastered the art, it can happen only once and it does not address the back itching problem very well.

On a relatively unrelated matter, the registrations for the second International Outsiders Festival are open:

www.outsidersfestival.blogspot.com

Blog Action Day 09 Climate change

2009-10-14T15:53:00.000-07:00

Global Warming - Stefan Maguran

The blogosphere is abuzz today on this important issue.
Let's hope our elected leaders can listen and act.

Just think about losing Andrew Bolt's anti - Global Warming blog. It will be a disaster!

Blog Action Day:

www.blogactionday.org

The Twelfth Annual South Australian Premier's Food Awards 2009

2009-10-01T13:33:00.000-07:00

Cherchez la femme - Stefan Maguran 2009

Received in the mail the other day:
"Everyone is invited to 'celebrate the magic' on Friday 6 November 2009 as the Adelaide Convention Centre shines brightly in recognition of our amazing finalists and for the announcement of the winners of The Twelfth Annual South Australian Premier's Food Awards.
With more networking opportunities available than ever before, it is a fantastic opportunity to meet the 'magicians' who make up this State's amazing food industry.
All guests attending will be eligible to win a deluxe Hilton Adelaide accommodation for two.
Like last year's event, the Awards presentation gala dinner will be carbon neutral, taking into account environmental practices to save energy."

My heart pounded. I said to myself - this is a great opportunity and I should make sure to clean my black tie.
Then I saw the price: $150.
Well, that price sheds a different light on the word "everyone". Called my bank who was happy to talk about my mortgage repayments schedule, then tucked my black tie away for another time.
And then today I hear about the Premier being attacked at a function at the Wine Centre.
It is a very sad state of affairs when violence shows its ugly head. I hear the Premier is bruised and I wish him a speedy recovery.

Blackberry and Stalinist methods don't mix, Cher Monsieur Pellisier

2009-09-24T15:51:00.000-07:00

In a clumsy attempt to justify the 23 suicides in France Telecom, the CFO, Gervais Pelissier makes an outrageous claim that BlackBerry is partially to be blamed for the stress of a "fragile employee with difficulties that would probably have more confusion with more mixture between personal life and professional life than in the past".
http://www.news.com.au/business/story/0,27753,26122817-31037,00.html
Cher Monsieur, BlackBerry should allow your employees to be out and about, at the Gym, a spa, having lunch and a bottle of Beaujolais, if it wasn't for the Stalinist methods used in restructuring all over the world.
For some weird reason which I dare to say is due to lack of imagination from senior management, the universal method of restructuring is creating a state of tension, pressure, terror, the old Divide et Impera so popular in the Roman Empire.
Are you sure that your company is allowing your employees to be empowered by the freedom a BlackBerry is offering? Are you sure that you are not imposing absurd restrictions on people's freedom to do their job? Are you sure you are not requiring (at least implied) that employees to spend outrageous hours at the office with no clear understanding of what the future may bring?
Why is relocation such a big part of your restructuring program, when having the tools to work from home or from anywhere in the world should make the location of your offices a non-issue?
Be honest, Mr. Pelissier - I know you are blaming BlackBerry now, but what about when your employer decides you are not longer required?

23 dead for a job

2009-09-18T00:02:00.000-07:00

"I'm going to become the 23rd staff member to commit suicide," 32-year-old Stephanie wrote in an e-mail sent to her father just moments before she flung herself out of her fourth storey office window. (News.com.au 18/09/09)

I've read the comments to this story and a lot of people keep asking the same ill informed question - why didn't she quit?
Where are these people living? How on Earth they cannot understand that there is a recession, that after 30 you are considered too old to get a new job, that in spite of all that, you are expected to work until you are 70 and pay your bills and that society as a whole does not want to know?
What options do you have?
Then there are those who say - it is depression - you need to seek help. Sounds great, as they are not specialists in the field, they can wash their hands.
It is not that simple! That poor lady was on anti depressants for the last five years.
Not to mention that I don't believe any of the people who suggest contacting someone like beyondblue have ever done it.
Try it, before you talk - the most depressing experience in my life.
It's time to listen, people and act - help the people in need, don't just point the finger at them.

Rest in peace, Stephanie and the other 22, my sincere condolences to your families.

On other news:
"A DEPRESSIVE illness is forcing senior Coalition frontbencher Andrew Robb to take three months leave.
A call to beyondblue chairman Jeff Kennett six weeks ago led to Mr Robb visiting a psychiatrist who diagnosed the condition. Treatment has proved more gruelling than he expected. Drugs are sending him into deeper depression before any benefits emerge - prompting the decision to move to the back bench."
(News.com.au - 19/09/09)
Quod Erat Demonstrandum

Position cancelled

2009-09-15T20:04:00.000-07:00

Thank you for your application for the position of R&D Manager with the ABCD brand within XYZ Australia. Unfortunately this position has been cancelled. We thank you for your interest in XYZ Australia and invite you to re apply should this position be re-advertised.

This is Fred in his Tamagochi enclosure.

After busting his butt off helping Australian companies move their manufacturing offshore (very successfully, I might add), Fred is now relying on public kindness to be fed.

It is the condition faced by many Australian ex workers and Artists who have to apply for grants and public support to survive.

A sad state of affairs, indeed.

Carbon footprints

2009-07-27T15:21:00.000-07:00

Concerned citizens have embarked on a campaign to raise awareness about the effects of the human activity on Global Warming.
The local councils will spend some considerable time and money to remove these signs.
The carbon emissions associated with this activity will be offset by increasing some taxes for planting some trees.
A win-win situation.

Cigarettes, whiskey and wild women

2009-07-18T16:18:00.000-07:00

The world oldest man, Henry Allingham has died aged 113 after a life of cigarettes, whiskey and wild, wild women.

The secret of his longevity - they were all organic and free range.

They're going, one by one

2009-06-30T14:05:00.001-07:00

A sign of our time... They're going, one by one... No more Pink Floyd, Bee Gees, the Beatles, and now Michael Jackson. Our generation has produced so many great talents. It was like the New Renaissance. It shall be remembered as such. RIP, Michael.

What's in a name?

2009-06-18T12:52:00.000-07:00

Recent articles in the Media have made very concerned.

"A study by the Australian National University has found people with Chinese names are much more likely to be knocked back for a job interview than applicants with an Anglo-Saxon name."

The Australian - June 17, 2009, and

"Northern Ireland's police chief warned Thursday that recent attacks on Romanian immigrants that forced 20 families to flee their homes are damaging the region's economy and reputation." - Associated Press - 18 June, 2009

The first article makes no mention about my chances of getting a job with my Romanian name, but I don't think they are that good.

The second article makes me extremely worried - I am not sure if my home insurance covers for ethnic attacks. The fact that I am of Romanian origin does not seem to help in getting a job that much either.

Add to that my age and I am almost certain to live from handouts from now.

Self confidence - a sign of our time

2009-06-08T17:20:00.000-07:00

A sign of times to come?

2009-05-28T17:35:00.000-07:00

Last time, the recession lasted 24 years. And a war.

Not sure how to read this

2009-05-26T18:45:00.000-07:00

To me, it looks like she's going down, but then, it could be the Expulsion from Paradise.

No trucks

2009-05-23T14:54:00.000-07:00

If it walks like a truck and it quacks like a truck, then I would have thought it must be a truck.

Lost in translation

2009-05-21T14:29:00.000-07:00

Gouache noir white negro made in China

Tough decisions

2009-05-18T14:46:00.000-07:00

Cash is king. Stock is a killer in these economic times. Sell!

The Finks Motorcycle Club has been declared

2009-05-17T22:53:00.001-07:00

The South Australian Government has declared the Finks Motorcycle Club.

Lost interest

2009-05-16T14:26:00.001-07:00

Faced with the economic downturn, most people have lost interest for a long time and are not prepared to commit upfront. Cash is king.

Value adding

2009-05-14T14:23:00.000-07:00

What goes in is cheaper than what comes out.

A sad day for Collingwood supporters

2009-05-12T14:29:00.000-07:00

And it has little to o with the Budget announced by Wayne Swan.

Manneken Pis 75 Euros

2009-05-10T14:04:00.001-07:00

Doing a Manneken pis can cost you 75 Euros.

Happy Mother's day!

2009-05-09T14:42:00.001-07:00

God could not be everywhere so he created mothers.

You can never get lost in France

2009-05-08T16:26:00.000-07:00

All you have to do is - follow the signs.

Clean up after your dog

2009-05-07T12:53:00.001-07:00

Better still, get the dog to read signs.

Although, there are images in the world that inspire... I just hope my dog has no artistic abilities.

See Europe in style

2009-05-06T14:41:00.000-07:00

Australian made using Australian ingredients

2009-05-05T13:47:00.001-07:00

At R B Day Supercraft, all mattresses are made locally using locally sourced ingredients.

A beach in Paradise

2009-05-04T14:17:00.001-07:00

Watch out! Snakes!

Open other side

2009-05-03T14:37:00.001-07:00

Resilience - the power to overcome adversity. No need to cry over spilled milk.

Drive through with a twist (or more)

2009-05-02T15:37:00.000-07:00

Beware! Stobie pole behind!

Just as I was loading my gun

2009-05-01T21:15:00.000-07:00

Commonwealth of Australia - Shooting upon or over this land is prohibited.

I reckon that's a bloody good idea!